...RosePerspective...

I can hear you say my name

Although your voice is a distant memory

Your heartbeat I still hear

In sync with mine, the rhythm is the same

Forever we are together, if only in my mind

I can feel your kiss

Upon my forehead, like a fingerprint 

it’s etched into my skin, unable to be removed

You live inside my dreams

I can see your face

Even with my eyes open

Your image is before me

Despite the many storms

Because you are my rainbow

My promise

Promise of true love

You are here, not physically beside me

But within the rooms of my heart

You have taken residence behind a secret door

Locked it and swallowed the key

So that you can remain

With me

I breathe and I know that with every inhale

You are my definition

January 2012.

What does this mean to me?

For starters, I’ve celebrated my first anniversary (12.29.10) with the Mr. It is said that the first year of marriage is the toughest. Making it through year one will give fuel to keep on going. Kudos to us! Year one was a roller coaster of emotions. For real. But as we head into year two, I know that more love is needed, more prayer, and more faith in each other will be the remedy to give us strength. 

Secondly, I’ve decided to finally transition into vegetarianism. I’ve been saying for years that “one day, this and one day, that”. Well today (or rather January 1st) is the day for me to put some action behind my words. I’m still researching and learning what being a vegetarian entails, but so far I think that my diet will consist of: no beef/pork/chicken/turkey/eggs but I will still consume seafood and dairy products. On NYE I had the biggest farewell bacon cheeseburger. It was great too.

The new year means I have another 365 days to make my life better. In all areas. As a wife, as a mother, as a person. By December 2012, I should have GOALS accomplished. I have way to much potential inside of me to let it go to waste. Some friends of mine introduced me to “Vision Boards”. I made mine today (1.2.12) and I’m proud of what I see in my future. 

I love January. It symbolizes NEW BEGINNINGS. 2012 is going to be like no other year for me. I’m declaring that it is my turn to rise to the top. Everything and everyone that has brought me down or hurt me will no longer hold weight in my heart. Those burdens are gone. I’m ready to live a happy, fulfilling, God-guided life. 

Happy New Year folks :)

What do you want to be when you grow up? 

I remember the answer changing so many times throughout my young life. I have said a beautician, a music producer, a novelist, a teacher, a lawyer, a journalist, a social worker, a school counselor, a rich wife…etc. During my days at Howard University, I earned a degree in Print Journalism. However, as I type this, I am currently an Assistant Teacher/Activity Coordinator at a child development center. What happened to that journalism career? Who knows? I figured out junior year that it wasn’t for me. The truth is, I have no idea what it is that I truly want to do for the rest of my life. There are many things I want to do. MANY! I am the first to admit that I can be pretty darn indecisive. This could be the reason why I am slow to pick a career path and stick to it.

There is a certain someone who seems to think that I don’t care about anything, says I’m shallow, and comfortable with just living an okay life. This person says that they don’t know my goals/dreams and what I’m passionate about. That’s saddening considering who this person is. They say that I have no idea about what’s going on in the world. I’m a pretty bad person huh?

I will say that I could do a better job with current events. I will skim through headlines, but I don’t watch the news. I’ve never been interested in politics and that too should and will change. I have to be a role model for my kid right? If I expect him to be aware, it starts with me.

As far as my career, when I am able to go back to school, I plan to pursue School Counseling. I began coursework in Social Work but right now I don’t see it working out for various reasons. However, getting a Master’s in School Counseling will allow me to do what I want to do anyway, which is counsel children. Eventually, time and money permitting, I want to be a child psychologist. I want to provide therapy for children with mental health illnesses/disorders. I started out on the wrong path in regards to journalism, but I believe what God has for me, is for me. 

There are LOTS of things that I care about:

• On Saturday, October 29th, I participated in my first Suicide Prevention community walk. I lost my mother in 2008 and a close friend just this year in September to suicide. I have made it my priority to be involved with suicide prevention. I will be volunteering with the American Foundation of Suicide Prevention.
• I have NEVER shared this in a public forum, but I am a victim of child sexual abuse. Because of my experiences, I have decided to become a online hotline volunteer for RAINN (Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network)
• Some of you may know that I am a mother, and also the founder of Cocoa Mama, Cocoa Baby. CMCB is a support group for young mothers, and a playgroup for our children. It is my hope to make CMCB much more than a support group, and with the help of my closest friends, we will become an organization involved with community service, teen parenting outreach, etc etc (don’t take my name or my ideas lol)
• My first love will always be writing. It is my goal to author greeting cards, children’s books, and novels. (maybe a movie or two, as well)

That’s just some of the big things that I want to accomplish in my life. My problem has never been whether or not I have dreams and aspirations but rather what I do to accomplish these goals. I am easily distracted and quick to be unmotivated. I need to stay focused and get to work. 

Everyone is entitled to their opinion of me so, sir, if you think I’m shallow and unconcerned with life, that’s fine.

There’s a whole lot more to me.  

Decided to start this blog “Rose Perspective” to highlight the good things in my life. If I sat down with you and told you half of the things I’ve been through you would ask me why am I not depressed. The answer is, I don’t have time to drown in my sorrows. I have a beautiful son, a wonderful husband, and I’m here! Life is not a perfectly painted picture and I’ve had my share of ups and DOWNS. But I’m still here. Still here to make each day better than the last. God has my back, so I’m declaring my happiness and peace, even in the midst of the storm. 

Smooches XOXOXO

Get to know me:

Natural Hair Blog: www.bornbeauTEEful.tumblr.com

Twitter: @RosePerspective